Sandalwood Smoke and Strawberry Cheesecake After Midnight

This Valentine’s Day looked different...

This season has stretched us. Between physical therapy appointments, neurologist visits, chronic pain, and learning how to move through injury together, love has looked less like grand gestures and more like steady presence and little moments.

Adrian cannot drive right now, so instead of shopping separately like we usually do for Valentine’s Day and surprising each other the morning of, we shopped side by side.

We used gift cards from my mom in her most recent care package, to create baskets for each other. Love layered on love it felt like.

His walker converts into a wheelchair. When he sits, I push him. It actually helps my back because it gives me something steady to lean into. So there we were, rolling through Marshall’s after PT. Then Livy’s Ice Cream. The next day after neurology, Panera for lunch and then Target.

In the aisles, he would sit while I sat on the floor holding up candles for him to smell. If they were at his level, he would grab them and hand them down to me. We laughed. We took our time. We were not rushing.

At Marshall’s, he smelled a Whiskey and Leather Teakwood cologne and loved it. I tucked it aside for his basket. I found him a coco coffee salt scrub and a double sided back scrub brush for the shower, something refreshing, grounding and warm.

At Target, I built the rest intentionally. Goodfellow beard wash, Mint and cedar beard balm, and face lotion with kelp and sea mineral. New additions to his self care routine. The quiet parts of his healing.

When we were looking at mugs, I saw one and read it out loud, “Best Person Ever.” I smiled, walked over, put it right into the basket in front of him, kissed his cheek, and told him he is. Because through all of it. ..Through all the years... The highs and lows...The ups and downs... He really is my favorite person ever.

I picked out a notebook for him and He picked out his Sharpie S Gel pens himself because the man is very particular about his pens ha

A few days later and all the sudden

He looked at the clock and said, “It’s midnight. Happy Valentine’s Day,” and brought me mine.

I exclaimed wait! and went to get his.

We stood there at midnight opening them because we could not wait for morning. Like Christmas...But softer...

I opened my card first.

On the outside, I saw my name written... 'Kristen Scott' And in the 'S' of Scott, he had drawn a swan 🦢 I noticed the detail immediately. The curve of it. The intention. A small rose at the bottom, so similar to the rose tattoo on my finger.

Inside the envelope, the artwork showed two swans forming a heart. The same quiet theme carried through.

Then I opened the basket.

A Vanilla Latte sugar scrub that smells divine. An Enchanted Vanilla Sugar glass swan candle, delicate and clear, matching the swan drawn into my name and the swans on the card.

A philosophy Raspberry Sorbet bubble bath gel. My favorite Tru Fru, the blueberry and white chocolate cream ones I had not tried yet and loved. Ariana Grande Cloud perfume from my wish list, soft lavender, vanilla orchid, and coconut. A hair towel because he said I need one. He knows me and loves me so well.

The swans stayed with me.

I did some research out of curiosity and found out tonight that swans mate for life. They look graceful above the water, but beneath the surface they are working hard to stay afloat.

They are powerful beneath the surface.

On top of the water, swans look calm and elegant. Underneath, their feet are paddling hard.

So me!

So us.

Love is not always surprise and separate shopping and big reveals!

Sometimes it is pushing.

Sometimes it is leaning.

Sometimes it is building baskets side by side in the candle aisle.

Sometimes it smells deep and earthy like sandalwood.

Sometimes it feels sandalwood like smoke after the fire, when the air is clearing and you can finally breathe again.

Sometimes it tastes like strawberry cheesecake. Sweet. Soft. Worth the wait.

Tomorrow night we will use our movie gift card to go see Wuthering Heights... We will have dinner at home and share Häagen Dazs Strawberry Cheesecake ice cream together.

The smoke and the sugar.

The fire and the forgiveness.

The paddling beneath the surface.

The swans still facing each other.

That is marriage.

"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls, one can help the other up." -Ecclesiastes 4:9 and 10

<Happy Valentine’s Day to you, wherever you are reading this. Whether your love feels effortless right now or like steady paddling beneath the surface, may it be rooted, resilient, and real.

And if you are single, whether you are open and ready or healing and guarded, may this day remind you that love is not scarce. It is not late. It is not reserved for everyone but you. Your story is still unfolding beautifully.>

Kristen, Unfiltered Xo 💋