🩵 A Letter to the me who Said “Never Again”

Dear Me...

I remember her....

The girl who loved with her whole soul, who gave her heart without holding anything back...

Who stayed up late hoping and waiting to feel chosen...

Who gave her body away hoping it would earn the love her soul was craving....

She mistook chaos for passion...

She mistook attention for affection...

She mistook eyes that looked for her body as eyes that had seen her soul...

She mistook anxiety for butterflies...

She mistook pain for proof that it was real...

She mistook lust for love...

And when it all crashed down,

when it left her empty, questioning, and undone...she whispered a promise through the tears:

> “I never want to be in a love that consumes me again.”

That wasn’t weakness.

That was wisdom.

She didn’t know it then, but she was starting to wake up...

Starting to protect her peace...

Starting to protect her body...

Starting to protect her soul...

Starting to realize that love isn’t meant to feel like drowning...

So today, I honor her.

I thank her for walking away.

For choosing healing over obsession.

For beginning the journey back to herself...even when it was lonely.

Especially then...

And now, as the woman I am today, I reaffirm that vow:

> I will not let love devour me.

I will not disappear to make someone stay.

I will not confuse suffering with soulmates.

Instead…

I choose love that lets me breathe...

Love that feels like safety, not survival...

Love that reflects God’s character: faithful, tender, and true...

Because I don’t need a fire that burns me up to feel real.

I need a light that warms me gently, steadily and stays.

...and that’s what I find in my forever flame...the one who chose me once and for all and stays with me, by my side everyday...

The one who calls me his wife.

I am his...and he is mine...

Forever.

Love, Kristen...Unfiltered Xo 💋